Wednesday, November 4, 2009

37,000 ft view

The moon looked amazing as we taxied to runway 18L tonight at DFW. Here I sit again, seat 4F, winging it home to El Paso after only arriving at DFW less than 24 hours ago.  I flew in last night, picked up the rental car, another story all on its own, and headed up the road to Lawton.  Three and a half hours later I checked into the hotel and crashed. It's been a whirlwind week for sure. 
I can't believe that only nine days ago my Ella was born.  It seems like time is already running at a break-neck pace.  By now most of you have seen some photos, but rest assured, they do not do justice to the miracle that she is.  Not intending to discourage anyone from pregnancy, but it really is a miracle.  It is amazing to me that you can witness the birth of a child and deny the existence of a higher being. It really is miraculous.  Two cells become four, four become eight and seemingly in the blink of an eye there is a living, breathing, crying, and completely dependent life. 
I woke up this morning, showered, grabbed a bite and headed to our Ft. Sill office.  I was out on the recruiting trail again…we've got more slots to fill… What's a bit ironic to me is that in the current economy, when so many folks are desperate for jobs, we have plenty, but can't seem to find the right folks.  In the last month I've been to job fairs across the country and we are still searching.  It was a potential success today…time will tell.  You know you can never really tell a lot from a one-page resume and 5 minute interview.  
As I sit here staring out into the darkness at the lights below I am provided with a unique perspective, and it has set my mind off.  I wonder how this all looks from the heavens.  I wonder what it looks like to God as He gazes down on his glorious creation.  I wonder the thoughts that flood his being.  Surely they must be way greater than mine.  I look down and see folks driving, the new Cowboy's stadium…"the house that Jerry built", and all the lights from all the houses.  I think about the people in them and wonder what's going on in their lives.  Are they enjoying a meal with family? Are they just getting home from work?  Are they celebrating a child's birthday? Are they watching CNN and wondering how yesterday's election returns will have any effect on their lives?  Are they debating investment choices in a tumultuous market? Are they stressed because they don't know how they will pay their light bill next week?  I wonder…
After the job fair wrapped up I ran back by the office to discuss eligible candidates and talk about the next steps in the hiring process, chatted with a friend, and jumped back in the rental, headed for DFW.  I was able to make it back in time to take the early flight home, saving the company $300 on the rental car, and me three hours of sitting in DFW, most likely paying for internet! 
But what does God think when He gazes down on His precious children, all of us.  Now, being a father, I have changed my perspective…again…shocker.  It occurs to me that possibly this is what God feels when He looks down at us.  I think that when God looks down at what He created He is utterly heartbroken. 
You see, when I look at my daughter, my precious princess, only days old, I wonder….will she ever, ever know just how much I love her?  Will she know I am committed to doing whatever it takes to provide for her? Will she understand the sacrifices that will be made on her behalf?  I do not want her to realize all these things because I want a "thank you" or a pat on the back, or anything in return….rather, I want her to know how unbelievably important she is to me and how remarkably proud I will be of her, and how her comfort and well being will be the driving force behind many of my actions.  I want her to know that she is loved beyond anything she can ever do and that this love and affection cannot be garnered or earned by anything she ever does or will do.
When God looks down upon us….does His heart break, yearning for us to just realize how loved we are? Does He cry over our misguided efforts to garner His grace?  People listen…God is in love with you…each of you. He was in love with you when he started this thing.  He was in love with you before you were a pre-cellular structure.  He was in love with you from the start.  He has promised to provide us with everything we will need.  He is committed to do whatever he has to in order to meet your needs.  He is made the ultimate sacrifice on your behalf.  He gave his Son for you…literally…that is not a fancy literary metaphor…it is history.  I think that when God looks down he desperately desires that one day we might all realize just how much He loves us and how crazy He is about YOU! 
Think on it………………


Janette & Jason said...

love this, and you guys. Can't wait to meet Ella!

Abby and Pete said...

thanks B. and she probably won't know how much you love her...until she's a mama.